12 Gluten Free Mysteries

16th June 2020
Blog post

12 things that are troubling me (yes, I have too much time on my hands…)

(1) Why does gluten free bread smell a little odd? When you walk down the bakery aisle of a supermarket, it smells INSANE. Gluten free never smells like that.

(2) Why are there some foods that seemingly can’t be made gluten free? Like egg noodles? These foodie scientists have developed everything from gluten free bread to maltesers now… is gluten free egg noodles just impossible? There’s definitely the demand for them!!

(3) Why is the vegan stuff mixed in with the free from aisle now? I get that vegan stuff is “free from meat”, but why can’t they just make it two separate sections – one for allergen free and one for vegan/meat free. Even if they’re next to each other (like they often do in the freezer bit)? I want to be able to do this without reading a single label haha…

(4) Why hasn’t Mcdonald’s UK got gluten free buns yet? I have no words.

(5) Why did Pret decide to make their gluten free “sandwich” using 1 slice of bread? Where did the link come from? Do they think all gluten free people are on a “diet”?! It can’t just be a profit thing, surely. And I don’t get why they’re one of few places that can’t make it coeliac safe either.

(6) Why is the standard gluten free dessert option always a brownie? Everywhere you go – from restaurants to Costa? From my experience, the gf brownie still contains flour so they’ve had to adapt it. Gluten free cakes or other sweet options are just as easy to make. So why the brownie?

(7) Why do certain foods even contain wheat? I get it for the likes of bread, it tastes so much better with wheat haha!! But soy sauce… crisps…Morrisons stir fry veg… stuff like that. Does it actually make it taste any different?!

(8) Why are milkybar and smarties capable of making gluten free eggs for us at Easter, but they can’t make their regular products gluten free? Again, no words.

(9) Why did Dominoes cut the gluten free pizza from their “slimmed down” coronavirus menu? Same with Marks & Spencer sandwiches? And why did they manage to add new vegan stuff? Surely if they’ve “had to cut down on the prep”, brand new products shouldn’t be introduced.

(10) Why do some bottles of squash contain barley? No one in the history of ever has EVER tasted a barley squash and said “god I love that barley taste!” (thanks to @gentlebea for this one!)

(11) Why are some products in the free from aisle only labelled with half the key allergens they “free from”? For example, the digestives below are free from gluten and milk and the coloured labelled at the top say as much. But, the poor old gluten AND milk free Oreos only get the gluten free label. Did the blue “milk free” label take a day off sick?! Were they running out of blue ink?!! A mystery.

(12) And the age old question… why is everything smaller?!!!

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